Introduction: Being a single Christian is nerve-wracking at times, especially during couple-centered holidays like the one being celebrated this weekend. However, let not your hearts be troubled; below is a compiled list of songs just for you guys! I hope these songs help you as much as they have aided me in overcoming the longevity of the single season.
“Just a Friend” by Jamie Grace: Admittedly, this is my #1 single girl jam. I blast this song whenever I’m thinking of a guy I like to remind me that God’s got this all figured out. Because even when that guy actually does see you as just a friend, or just an acquaintance, or not at all (yeah…), God sees you as His creation, and like Jamie Grace says, He sees what you don’t. So who knows? That guy could be a Wickham, or a Darcy, or a Knightley in shining armor… but trust God to reveal the outcome to you. Just be a friend until God says it’s go time.
“Tell Me” by He is We: Whenever I’m feeling doubtful about ever finding love, I turn to this lovely little tune by one of my favorite bands. “Tell Me” focuses on praying for your future spouse, which is 100% necessary if marriage to a godly person is a desire of your heart. Prayer and keeping faith in God’s plan for your life are the only ways to survive the dark alleyways (i.e. loneliness) of the single season. Just trust Him; God’s got your back.
“The Waiting” by Jamie Grace: When you’re trying your darnedest to wait patiently for something you really desire, the struggle is real. But, when we’re waiting on God and putting faith in His infallible timing, faith keeps us on track. Remember, you’re not alone in this. You’re not the first, nor the last, to be kept waiting for love. Keep holding God’s hand and be patient, because His love will never leave you.
“Love is Waiting” by Brooke Fraser: “Musing lazily on love… pondering you.” Seriously, like every single (no pun intended) day of my life. Ha, but that’s not the point of this song. “Love is waiting ’til we’re ready, ’til it’s right”: that, right there ladies and gentlemen, is the point. If you currently have no “prospects” (something my momma calls potential people who want to date you… yeah don’t ask…), you may feel as if you’re unlovable. Been there, suffered through that. But to be honest, it’s not because you’re “unlovable”; it’s because God finds you totally lovable, and He sees that you’re not ready to mingle with the right person yet. So wait. When God wants you to meet your Jedi Knight in Shining Nerdom (or whatever else you prefer to call them), He’ll place them in your path. No need to rush love, my friends.
“White Boots” by Jamie Grace: Okay, so here we have a third mention for Jamie Grace, but only because she’s the reigning queen of CCM single season songs. “White Boots” is about purity. Sometimes when people hear the word purity, they automatically think of the physical aspect of the word, when in reality purity spans beyond remaining abstinent until marriage. Staying pure also relies on keeping our minds free of toxic thoughts that would get between our relationship with our Truest Love: Jesus Christ. So watch what you think and watch what you do, because He’s always watching you!
“Every Little Thing” by Hawk Nelson: I knew I was going to be in love with this song from the moment the first verse ended, mainly due to the fact that it reminds me of Landon and Jamie’s story in A Walk to Remember. Imagine someone being head-over-heels in love with you mainly due to your love for Jesus. Then, imagine falling in love with that person for the same reason. You see, worldly relationships are between two flawed people, and that’s why America has a divorce rate of 50%. Godly relationships are between three: husband, wife, and Jesus Christ. Jesus is the glue that holds marriages together, not the piece of paper that proclaims your marital status. So say goodbye to the brokenhearted, because if you keep Jesus in your heart, every little thing will fall into place.
“Keeping Me Guessing” by Francesca Battistelli: That’s the thing about our Lord, He keeps us guessing. Sometimes it’s nice to be surprised, but I’m going to be completely honest here, it’s frustrating not knowing what’s going to happen. There’s always that nagging thought at the back of my mind, “will I be single forever?” I used to let the frustration fuel my hate fire for being stuck in the single season, but that only made me develop a cynical attitude towards the idea of finding love. Only when I realized that God is omnipotent and all-knowing, and that little ol’ me has no control over what or who the future may bring, did the frustration subside. And who knows, some of us may end up being single forever. However, that doesn’t constitute our worth, especially to God. Remember this: “But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord” -1 Corinthians 7:32. No matter if you ever find love on earth, our God will always hold a special place for you in His heart. If that isn’t true love, I don’t know what is.
…even when you just want to cry and stuff your face with five pints of Ben & Jerry’s…
“Be My Escape” by Relient K: I could fangirl about this song, but I’ve already explained why it’s one of my favorites (and the inspiration for this blog) in and earlier post. Instead, I’m going to recommend it as a song for those times when you’re traveling down the dark alleys of loneliness. I lived in those alleys for a couple of years, and it was one the lowest points of my life. Because I tried and failed to fix the “problem” of singleness on my own, I fell into a rut of sorts, thinking that change was impossible. Hearing this song for the first time helped me see that only Jesus can be my escape from loneliness, not a change in my relationship status.
“Take Me” by Hawk Nelson: When you’re in the process of having a good old cry-fest, this song will work wonders for your outlook. Psalm 57:1 says: “Be merciful unto me, O God, be merciful unto me: for my soul trusteth in thee: yea, in the shadow of thy wings will I make my refuge, until these calamities be overpast.” This song emphasizes this verse in a beautifully healing manner, and I highly recommend it whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed about anything.
“More Than Useless” by Relient K: You’re single, not useless. Don’t let society’s expectations of relationships constitute how you feel about yourself. You are more than a relationship status. You are fearfully and wonderfully made, a work of art formed by God Himself! God makes no mistakes, and you my dear are certainly not a flaw in His system; society’s expectations are where the errors lie.
“Faithful” by Brooke Fraser: Praying, at times, can feel like a one-sided conversation, especially when you’re praying for love. When you have no “prospects”, it may seem like God is ignoring your request. The truth of the matter is that either He’s preparing you for the answer to your prayers, or He is trying to get you to realize that it is not in His plan for you. Yes, the latter outcome is not what you want to hear, though it is exactly what you need. Going back to the fact that we don’t know what our futures hold, why would your plan be better than God’s? He created this world. He created every one of us. He knows everything; we know diddly squat compared to that. So, why not have faith in His plan?
“Ill With Want” by The Avett Brothers: To many people, being single is thought of as an unwanted, almost plague-like condition that needs to be fixed in order to feel any amount of worth. In this case, often times a greed for a relationship reformation settles in, a desperation for love of any kind, no matter how vile. People become ill with want, developing an addiction to toxic relationships, causing the problem to grow deeper roots. Like The Avett Brothers say in this song, “A need for something, now let me break it down again. A need for something, but not more medicine,” quick-fixes won’t solve deep-rooted problems. That “something” we need is a relationship with Jesus Christ, the only relationship that truly matters, and the only One that can heal our pain.
“His Name” by He is We: Have you ever cried yourself to sleep over this whole singleness issue? I used to, too. Quite frankly, it feels like rock bottom. Sounds loathsome, right? No one aspires to hit rock bottom. But, it’s not always a bad thing. Tony Evans said, “sometimes God lets you hit rock bottom so that you will discover that He is the Rock at the bottom”. Boom… there it is. Climb that Rock, seek the face of God. Let not your heart be troubled, you’re safe in the palm of His hand.
because this single season may not last forever…
and waiting on God is totally worth it. 😀 ❤
They may be out there, waiting for you, or they may not. However, God is always out there, always waiting for you, no maybe about it. You’re not alone, guys. Never have been, never will be.
“Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” -Joshua 1:9
Goodnight, and God bless!
Bonus (Non-music) Videos:
“Boys, Boys, Boys” and “Mom, Can I Have a Crush?” by Jamie Grace: The importance of approaching love with intention, and waiting on God to get you there. Besides… what’s the point of being in a relationship if your intention is not to glorify God once you get what you’ve been praying for?